How To Overcome The Anti Climax Of New Year

 How To Overcome The Anti Climax Of New Year
New Year often kicks off with a blast of new energy, fireworks and a huge goodbye to the previous year. Many people are often relieved that the old year is over and that they can make a fresh start. Goal-setting starts, visions-boards made, high expectations for success in the coming year. We schedule, plan, day-dream, envision the coming days, and then we hit an inner road bump, an anti-climax.

The anti-climax at New Year is similar to what is called ‘Post-coital Tristesse’ that some people feel after orgasm, the ride leading up the mountain to that deeply satisfying release and you may lie there awash in feel-good hormones, but sometimes the hormones don’t last too long and you are hit with a tidal wave of the ‘heavies’.

New Year’s Eve holds so much promise, but like many events created by humankind, we are in anticipation of a future not yet made, or not yet here, and because of this we are bound to feel a low after the high. From overindulging on sugary highs, perhaps drinking too much alcohol, the hectic flow of Christmas, it can damn well suck New Year.

Well…in the beginning anyway.

The crunch comes when we realise that all our well-meaning aims and goals take work, time and energy. We aim to be focused and driven, but what if we are still languishing in the previous years of ‘failure central’ where we put the effort in with very little or no return.

It can feel like we are heading down the same road again. We missed the junction that said, ‘Take the M44 to effortless grace and freedom’ and we fight the roadworks and traffic delays, and impatience sets in followed by the deep pit of a low mood.

January has been known to be a blue month, mental health issues can skyrocket as the comedown happens, which is why many people book holidays in January for the summer. It gives them yet another thing to look forward to, instead of being present with what is. Those unable to do this may just have to suffer with what comes up inside, but there is another way.

TAKE IT EASY AS YOU RIDE INTO THE NEW YEAR

Man relaxing
Photo by Sid Leigh on Unsplash

Don’t put unrealistic expectations on yourself at the beginning of the year

Be prepared to feel that life sucks from time to time

Realise that with the light of expectation and enthusiasm comes the darkness of doubt and resistance.

All of this is part of the flow of life.

Nature is exactly the same.

The seeds are planted and lie dormant during the winter and begin to push through the soil ready for the springtime, but is it an easy flourish of growth? No. The seed meets many obstacles and heavy soil it needs to move through, but it does see the light, at exactly the right time, not a moment before.

Why Put All Your Eggs Into January?

Learn to surf the waves of the new. Have compassion when you just can’t get your focus going and you are procrastinating. Relish taking your time over your passions, and understand that sometimes (not always), procrastination has a purpose too, for without procrastination you may not meet the people or opportunities that are heading your way.

If you fly ahead too fast you may just miss the door marked, ‘Come in, its time now!’

But of course, not all procrastination is a blessing; sometimes we procrastinate because we are terrified not of failure, we know failure only too well; it’s a comfort blanket for many of us, but success. Success scares the bejeebers out of us; it truly can be the thing holding many of us back.

What scares you the most about success? 

Man celebrating success
Photo by Ambreen Hasan on Unsplash

What are you gaining from failure or remaining small and hidden from view?

For me, I am discovering I had this belief inside me that success meant loneliness. Those who are family and friends would all vanish if I became a success and yes, some may be incredibly uncomfortable as I take my dance into the success zone, because some people really do need us to remain small and insignificant.

I recently discovered that someone who I thought was always better than me was actually deeply insecure. They needed me to be small and invisible. It will come as quite a shock to them when I step into my power.

I’m a little scared to do this, heck I’m probably a lot scared, which is why I’m writing this post because fearing success is more common than many of us realise.

Comfort zones, remaining in the safe (but uncomfortable) familiar places in life may appear easy, but in the long run, they hurt us. It’s only easy to stay there because we don’t have to do anything new, we don’t have to risk rejection, but by not risking rejection we also don’t risk praise either.

How small do you want to be this year?

What’s stopped you in your tracks?

Let’s get it straight and clear.

If you are anything like me right now, you know failure really well.

But you also fear failure once again.

AND success just feels like too big an unknown, but you know deep in your heart that you need to start embracing your personal power and facing your worth because, after all you are incredibly worthy, you are incredibly valuable and skilled, with talents awakening and still yet to be awakened in you.

Perhaps right now you don’t believe in your potential and this too is okay.

For now take it easy, be gentle with your process and keep questioning:

What am I so afraid of right now that is freezing me to complete inaction?

Am I scared of getting it wrong? Of it not being perfect?

Or am I scared of getting it right and my whole world changing and the people I consider loved ones and friends not accepting my new vision and new reality?

Only you will know your process.

Are you ready to step in and delve deep?

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Kelly Martin

Kelly Martin is the author of ‘When Everyone Shines But You’ , a passionate writer and blogger questioning life’s illusions. After what seemed like a decade of intense anxiety, feelings of failure and grief from the loss of her father she chose to take a mindfulness path and has not looked back since. Kelly encourages people to find the treasures that lie within the pain and suffering and to learn to see themselves as ‘enough’ exactly as they are, right now through her writing and You Tube channel .

Find me on: Web | Twitter | Facebook

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