Isolation: How To Be Truly Alone When Lonely

I’ve had my share of loneliness over the course of my 47 years on Planet Earth. I’ve felt isolated on more than one occasion, but facing isolation without using the old distraction methods is a whole different ballgame. Often, we feel lonely because we want something other than what is. We yearn for people, connection, and company, yet we can be in the company of others and still feel isolated…

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Being Authentic : Give Yourself Permission To Be Bad

As a recovering people-pleaser and recovering co-dependent person, it came as a shock to realise that to overcome and move forward beyond these patterns, I have to give myself permission to be bad. What does this mean? Most of us are programmed early on that to be a ‘good’ person, we need to be or do X,Y,Z. Your particular flavour of X, Y, and Z could be to be a…

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Are You Scared To Be Authentic?

The deeper we go into inner child work and look at the shadow, the more layers appear to be brought into the light. As a recovering people-pleaser, I’ve spent most of my life being whatever was needed ‘for other people’. Why did I do this? Anything we do that is against our natural flow is often to keep us safe. We have many behaviours we may engage in that protect…

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How To Help A Person Grieving

In September 2022 someone I loved deeply passed away after a rapid onslaught with cancer. On May 1st 2023 my best friend who I have been living with for 20 years passed away from sepsis and cancer. Both losses came rapidly, both people I physically cared for near the end of their lives. JUMP TO BULLET POINT LIST OF WHAT TO DO   In June 2023 I came to some…

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Why Showing Your Humanity Heals The World

Why Showing Your Humanity Heals The World We are led to believe we need to compete against other people, hide what truly pains us and make sure the outer world thinks we have our sh*t together. If we are a public figure this is doubly important, so they say. If you are teaching or leading people you need to be an empowering person of positivity, an example of how to…

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How To Embrace Anxiety and Manage The Symptoms

  This post ‘How To Embrace Anxiety and Manage The Symptoms’ is in collaboration with Spink Health. The content and opinions expressed below are that of kellymartinspeaks.co.uk   Anxiety is a tough experience, as I know only too well. I’ve suffered with anxiety since my early childhood and into my adult years. I understand how painful it feels, how stressful and how debilitating it can be.Throughout my childhood I was incredibly…

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How To Overcome The Anti Climax Of New Year

  New Year often kicks off with a blast of new energy, fireworks and a huge goodbye to the previous year. Many people are often relieved that the old year is over and that they can make a fresh start. Goal-setting starts, visions-boards made, high expectations for success in the coming year. We schedule, plan, day-dream, envision the coming days, and then we hit an inner road bump, an anti-climax.…

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Is It Time To Stop Censoring Yourself?

You sit alongside someone, a friend, family member or stranger and you feel you need to say something, but you hold yourself back because you are worried you may hurt that person’s feelings. This is when we start repressing the powerful wise voice inside. For some people, speaking out of turn and using hurtful words is a way to dominate others, but many of us have been taught that we…

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How To Stop Being Triggered By Life

“Not this again,” I’d catch myself saying. It was usually after a triggering event like someone parking my car in the driveway or when I felt unseen or excluded. I’d feel really pissed about it. I mean, how dare they! How could they be so rude? So inconsiderate? This reaction may seem pretty intense and I’m not going to sugar coat it, recovery from trauma is intense. Once that can…

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Are You Scared To Be Seen?

Have you ever been so scared about something you have cried? This was me recently.I know that many of my readers suffer from anxiety and depression and I imagine many of you experience social anxiety too. Some of you may have a fear of public speaking and some may have a deeper fear called a phobia. But what if your fear is of being ‘seen and heard’? This was my…

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