The Excitement Of Not Knowing!

Isn’t it exciting to not know? to not know where you are going or what you are awakening within you? One year ago I would have said the prospect of not having plans for the future or ideas about what I am to do with my life would have sent me into panic mode. Not anymore.As I said in another post my life has had a lot of changes in a short space of time. Mikes now no longer working at Asda and we are settling in to being family instead of romantic partners. Any anxiety has been replaced with excited anticipation and not knowing where life is leading me.

My current work in a little gift shop in my local area has given me overtime hours, so financially, things are still enjoyably moving. We have changed the shape of our home-life where I go out to work and Mike enjoys discovering more about himself and creating new avenues in his life.

It’s really wonderful to be in a position where life simply flows. Whereas in the past I had a long list of shoulds and what I thought I ought to be doing in my life I honestly don’t know where life is taking me. What is even more amazing is I don’t want to know in advance, I want to feel the thrill of life bringing me potentials and allowing myself to step into those that feel good for me. I would never had believed a year ago I could experience this within myself! Yay for me!

I am also finding such a depth of love for Mother Earth now, since working with my power animal I find myself being cocooned in natures love.

We went for a walk this afternoon and I asked Mike to walk the opposite direction to me around our favourite pond walk in the Forest of Dean so I could have some ‘me’ time and he did and I enjoyed a gentle saunter around the pond and felt such amazing emotion.

In the past I did not understand what this emotion was in my body I thought I was sad because I was so used to feeling sad and depressed in my life so what else could it be? I now recognise it as love. Nature loving me back into my real existence my plant nature, my spirit nature.

I did a journey in a meditation recently and was enveloped in a large leaf. I felt like I was being hugged by Gaia. I would like to explore this more because I know sometimes in nature my mind can go into overdrive and I can feel a fight inside me of the internal chatterbox, but sometimes I feel this silence and embrace the possibility of accessing this at all times.

On my walk today I saw green, blue and red dragonfly’s. I talked to them gently and they flew so close to me I could see their thousands of eyes and their luminescent colours.

If you awoke this morning and you found yourself devoid of a role, devoid of identifying with a job, a place or a home how would you feel? frightened? or excited to be alive?

I choose excitement.

  • The Shock Of The New
    Experiencing profound life changes, such as loss and relocation, can feel like a crash. Embracing these shocks offers opportunities for transformation and personal growth amid grief and uncertainty.
  • Memorial Jewellery: Finding Comfort in Grief After Losing a Loved One
    Discover how memorial jewellery, like ashes into rings or fingerprint pendants, provides a comforting connection to lost loved ones. Explore how these keepsakes offer peace, solace, and a sense of closeness, especially for those grieving suffering from mental health issues.
  • How To Embrace Uncertainty
    It’s okay not to know. Society trains us from an early age to know. Know about anything and everything. And if we don’t know how something works, we are taught to find out. If we don’t know how to do anything, we are taught to find out. We are never taught to sit in the…
  • Are You Lying To Yourself About Your Desires?
    It can be very easy to ‘want’ and ‘desire’ what we think we ‘ought to’ desire. We may even think these are our genuine wants, but what if they are not? What if we are kidding ourselves? Let me give you some examples: ‘I want a successful healing business’ ‘I want to be a bestselling…
  • Hate Anxiety? Love It Instead
    The Tiger of emotion or fear only bites when you run from it or try to cage it. Set it free.~ Kari Hohne, Cafe Au Soul I’m in my 48th year on planet Earth, and anxiety has been something I have spoken and written about a lot over the course of this blog (and in…
Follow:
Kelly Martin
Kelly Martin

Kelly Martin, author of ‘When Everyone Shines But You’ is a dedicated writer and blogger who fearlessly explores life’s deepest questions. Faced with a decade of profound anxiety and grief following the loss of her father and her best friend Michael, Kelly embarked on a transformative journey guided by mindfulness, and she hasn’t looked back since. Through her insightful writing, engaging podcasts, and inspiring You Tube channel Kelly empowers others to unearth the hidden treasures within their pain, embracing the profound truth that they are ‘enough’ exactly as they are.

Find me on: Web | Twitter/X | Instagram | Facebook

2 Comments

  1. August 22, 2007 / 11:44 pm

    Nice, Kelly. I love how things are unfolding for you. Your understanding of your own true emotions, your realization that it was okay to be friends,just not on a romantic basis, yet remaining family. Very insightful. The pictures are wonderful! Where did you find them?

  2. August 25, 2007 / 1:54 pm

    hello again, the pictures I found on google I think I typed in either earth mother or Gaia.
    xxx

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.