It’s okay not to know. Society trains us from an early age to know. Know about anything and everything. And if we don’t know how something works, we are taught to find out. If we don’t know how to do anything, we are taught to find out. We are never taught to sit in the feeling of ‘I don’t know’. Not knowing is okay. Not knowing who you are, not…
View PostIt can be very easy to ‘want’ and ‘desire’ what we think we ‘ought to’ desire. We may even think these are our genuine wants, but what if they are not? What if we are kidding ourselves? Let me give you some examples: ‘I want a successful healing business’ ‘I want to be a bestselling author’ ‘I want a partner’ What if these are not your true wants whatsoever, and…
View PostI’ve had my share of loneliness over the course of my 47 years on Planet Earth. I’ve felt isolated on more than one occasion, but facing isolation without using the old distraction methods is a whole different ballgame. Often, we feel lonely because we want something other than what is. We yearn for people, connection, and company, yet we can be in the company of others and still feel isolated…
View PostAs a recovering people-pleaser and recovering co-dependent person, it came as a shock to realise that to overcome and move forward beyond these patterns, I have to give myself permission to be bad. What does this mean? Most of us are programmed early on that to be a ‘good’ person, we need to be or do X,Y,Z. Your particular flavour of X, Y, and Z could be to be a…
View PostThe deeper we go into inner child work and look at the shadow, the more layers appear to be brought into the light. As a recovering people-pleaser, I’ve spent most of my life being whatever was needed ‘for other people’. Why did I do this? Anything we do that is against our natural flow is often to keep us safe. We have many behaviours we may engage in that protect…
View PostIn September 2022 someone I loved deeply passed away after a rapid onslaught with cancer. On May 1st 2023 my best friend who I have been living with for 20 years passed away from sepsis and cancer. Both losses came rapidly, both people I physically cared for near the end of their lives. JUMP TO BULLET POINT LIST OF WHAT TO DO In June 2023 I came to some…
View PostWhy Showing Your Humanity Heals The World We are led to believe we need to compete against other people, hide what truly pains us and make sure the outer world thinks we have our sh*t together. If we are a public figure this is doubly important, so they say. If you are teaching or leading people you need to be an empowering person of positivity, an example of how to…
View PostThis post ‘How To Embrace Anxiety and Manage The Symptoms’ is in collaboration with Spink Health. The content and opinions expressed below are that of kellymartinspeaks.co.uk Anxiety is a tough experience, as I know only too well. I’ve suffered with anxiety since my early childhood and into my adult years. I understand how painful it feels, how stressful and how debilitating it can be.Throughout my childhood I was incredibly…
View PostNew Year often kicks off with a blast of new energy, fireworks and a huge goodbye to the previous year. Many people are often relieved that the old year is over and that they can make a fresh start. Goal-setting starts, visions-boards made, high expectations for success in the coming year. We schedule, plan, day-dream, envision the coming days, and then we hit an inner road bump, an anti-climax.…
View PostYou sit alongside someone, a friend, family member or stranger and you feel you need to say something, but you hold yourself back because you are worried you may hurt that person’s feelings. This is when we start repressing the powerful wise voice inside. For some people, speaking out of turn and using hurtful words is a way to dominate others, but many of us have been taught that we…
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