Do You Know the Truth?

The world is full of a myriad of ideas and ways of viewing experience and events, but do any of us really know the truth? I’ve had this discussion on Twitter recently, because due to the pandemic in the UK, we have had a few laws put in place and a few temporary restrictions. Now, some would say they are not temporary, and I’ve had many people come to me…

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Why Awake People Don’t Think They Are Better

There are none more asleep than those who think they are awake. ~ Michael Doherty So, I woke up this morning thinking about understanding the world, critical thinking and questioning reality. Something that has been bothering me a lot lately is judgement. Now, I know I can be a judgemental so-and-so. I accept this. I actually quite appreciate the ‘me’ that judges what works for me and what doesn’t. Sometimes I…

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Why a Powerful NO Is a Gift

If you were brought up in a culture where people wanted you to be a certain way, perhaps your family and your teachers at school encouraged this, but what you wanted to do was often frowned upon or discouraged. You may have built your identity around a false sense of self. This is when the common trait of people-pleasing begins. In your early years, if your confidence was not high,…

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Why It’s Time to Drop Your Socially Acceptable Mask

“Almost any emotion/behavior can be used as a mask.  Maybe you mask insecurity by disliking others or mask sadness by being the life of the party or mask fear by being perfectionistic. Putting on a mask is a way of disappearing–being invisible. Masks provide some emotional protection in the short run.  But the costs of wearing masks are high. When you wear a mask, you don’t really feel the warmth…

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Why Being Nice and Social Conditioning Stops Self Love

Listen above or tune in on Apple Podcasts or Podbean EPISODE 99 – PODCAST TRANSCRIPT Hi there, welcome back to Kelly Martin Speaks. I’m your host Kelly Martin and this is episode 99. Today I’m going to talk about letting go of social conditioning and why being nice isn’t the answer everything. As a reformed people pleaser, it’s taken me a long journey to get to where I am today.…

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How Fear of the Unknown Can Create Division

Fear can divide us as a people. Just look at the world today, so many of us are experiencing fear. Right now we have a ‘divide and conquer’ taking place in politics and in many countries. In my own life I am experiencing this on a big scale. Those of you reading from outside the UK may read all about Brexit, where the UK voted on a referendum to leave…

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Why ‘Not Caring’ Can Be Really Weird in The Beginning

A long time ago in my childhood, I was taught that the most important thing to do in relationship to other people, was to please them. I was shown that what other people thought of me truly mattered and so for 39+ years I lived as a shell of myself, to prove myself to the world. While others were more outspoken, I kept my opinion and thoughts to myself and…

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5 Powerful Life Lessons I Learned In 2017

2017, the year incredible things happened in the world both good and bad. A time when people were divided, hate reigned, love rose up and women owned their powerful voices. Numerologically, 2017 was a number 1, a time of change, new beginnings, independence and becoming who you are. This year was phenomenal. I had so many new experiences, so much change, so many new beginnings and lots of goodbyes and…

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Is It Time To Stop Censoring Yourself?

You sit alongside someone, a friend, family member or stranger and you feel you need to say something, but you hold yourself back because you are worried you may hurt that person’s feelings. This is when we start repressing the powerful wise voice inside. For some people, speaking out of turn and using hurtful words is a way to dominate others, but many of us have been taught that we…

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Are You Scared To Be Seen?

Have you ever been so scared about something you have cried? This was me recently.I know that many of my readers suffer from anxiety and depression and I imagine many of you experience social anxiety too. Some of you may have a fear of public speaking and some may have a deeper fear called a phobia. But what if your fear is of being ‘seen and heard’? This was my…

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