Insights on myself are coming in thick and fast right now. Understanding my desires in life and revealing my true face to myself has been an eye opener.
Why do any of us want anything in life?
I realised my prime reason in life is to feel absolutely excellent!
It is not to share, donate to charity, ‘be spiritual’ the overall essence of what I want in my life is to feel really really good.
Yes, this may have a knock on effect in that what makes me feel good is sharing with others and giving but if you think about it the very act of giving is selfish too. Most if not all people give to others to feel good, it makes them feel good to give. So in essence most if not all of us are selfish.
I think selfishness has been given a bad rap for eons of time. Most of this from religious texts
- being selfish is a sin
- being selfish is bad
- being selfish is wrong
- being selfish is greedy
How many of these beliefs have we all been indoctrinated into?
Yes there are some people who are selfish and do everything that feels good for them and in the process trample on people and the environment. But would most of us do this? If we even question this we probably would not. We would choose to feel good in ways that enhance the world around us.
Last night I asked myself why do I want lots of money? Why do I want to be in business? Why do I want to move more into the ethical fair trade market? and the simple answer if I am honest.
It feels good.
Mike asked me last night if I was gifted a few million pounds today would I run businesses? would I ? hmmmm….
I listened to my inner answers and discovered some interesting things about feeling good.
What if being in business is simply a way to show the world I deserve lots of money because I work hard and have gained money through blood sweat and tears?
What if being spiritual and sharing and giving and donating to charity is simply to show to the world – I deserve money because I give.
What if I deserve to have lots of money to simply do what I want with it, to feel absolutely excellent in every single way and I don’t need to prove that I deserve this?
It has been a scary thought but feels totally authentically me. I know I hid these feelings from even myself how many people out there do the same?
We are told to give.
Mike said to me perhaps when we give we are acknowledging our abundance and its not about the giving its about saying “hey I feel good I am abundant?”