Are You Chasing Self-Esteem?

For the longest time I believed that to have high self-esteem was a worthy goal to aim for. I didn’t even realise I had this goal until recently. Practising mindfulness led me into a less goal/future orientated approach to living and a more ‘present moment’ experience. Little did I know, lingering in the back of my mind, was the desire to not have low self-esteem and this automatically created the…

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Jealousy – How To Use It As A Motivational Tool

Jealousy, a feeling many people experience, is something that can cause a depressive mood, anger, rage and sometimes numbness. I was a very jealous person, and I still have my moments. My jealousy was not so much in romantic relationships, but more an intense jealousy of people ‘appearing’ to do far better than me in life. My list of jealousy moments included: Jealousy of friends and family succeeding professionally and…

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Top 10 Tips on Setting Boundaries

1. Start to see your ‘No’s as an affirmative ‘Yes’ to your life! Every time you allow someone to cross a personal boundary you are giving them permission to keep on doing ‘whatever’ they are doing and saying to yourself that you do not deserve better. 2. Remember you are not being mean to anyone by setting boundaries. When you don’t set boundaries you are being mean to yourself instead.…

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Rosacea and Shame

As a teenager I had quite bad acne, but rosacea did not come until my late twenties after my father died. I know that many people try to treat rosacea with a chemical or cream-based approach, and I did the same for some time so desperate was I to be rid of this condition. Alas nothing worked consistently until I realised that rosacea is not simply a ‘one-size fits all’…

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The Reality Of Hope – Living For The Future

In all my experiences and journey through the subject of mindfulness and Advaita, I naively thought I could keep HOPE. I realised how conditioned I was to hope. I have hoped all my life; I was hoping more than I was aware of until now. I thought if I just stopped trying to mistakenly ‘create my reality’, that I was fully present, in the now. I was wrong. HOPE was…

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Do You ‘OWN’ Who You Are?

  We are told to be authentic, to be who we really are, but how many of us truly ‘own’ who we are? Maybe you’re single, walking down the street and you see a couple holding hands and laughing and smiling and in that instant you reach out to that couple, yearning to have what they have, in essence to be who they are. You may also be feeling lonely,…

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Top 10 Self Acceptance Books For Living A Compassionate Life

We all need a bit of encouragement in life and many of us are brought up into a life where we have no vocabulary for kindness. We may have been abused, bullied, neglected as children, or we may have been domestically abused in our adult lives. All of these factors can leave us with no idea about how to have compassion for self, or to even think kinder thoughts. And…

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Embrace The Dark and Light Within You

Can you feel the beauty in moving from joy to sadness? Or is being positive more important to you? What if I told you that focusing ‘only’ on the positive keeps you stuck? I’ve been awake on my spiritual path since 1999, but I went through many cycles in that time. For the first 7 years or more I was enthused by exciting possibilities in life that I had never…

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Being Human Part 5: Love Yourself For NOT Loving!

We are told time and time again: “You must love yourself”. And yet when we are feeling less loving towards others, it feels like an impossible thing to do.  Instead why not… Love Yourself For NOT Loving   Can you love yourself for not loving someone or not liking someone? It seems to go against the grain of so many spiritual teachings. We are taught to be compassionate and to…

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Accepting Your Flaws – Gateway To Change

Flaws Can Be Beautiful If We See The Jewels In The Mire How do you feel about your flaws?    Those aspects of your personality that you are probably not too fond of?    What if I told you that the changes you desire and the peace that you want, depend on those flaws getting your full acceptance and attention?   Sometimes in life we are just going through the…

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