Maybe You’re Not A Good Person?

  “What you run from you run into” ~ Nikita Tweet This! It can be hard to acknowledge and accept that you’re not a ‘good’ person. I pride myself on being a ‘good’ person, thinking if I haven’t got what everyone else has (home of my own, regular income, relationship, family, confidence) at least I’m a ‘good’ person. When you’ve been carrying such a heavy ‘failure’ story for so long, to…

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V Is For VULNERABILITY

Feeling vulnerable, something I have felt a lot in my life. Vulnerable in relationships, vulnerable in grief, vulnerable in loneliness – vulnerable. “Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it. Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and joy—the experiences that make us the most vulnerable. Only when we are…

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S Is For SEXY

What is sexy to you? I used to think it was tall dark handsome, but now, as I have grown more wise (grin), I realise that sex appeal is an inside job. Someone can be stereotypically beautiful and have no sex appeal at all. Sexy comes from within, physical beauty that we are often brainwashed to believe to be sexy needs to have the whole package. My boyfriend told me…

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N Is For Neediness

Neediness, something I used to be the Queen of. I was needy in friendships, needy with partners and in relationships, I was just plain needy. Needless to say neediness can give off a bright shining beacon saying ‘I’m needy, stay away!’ I’m writing this article not to criticise anyone who feels needy. I know what it feels like to feel needy and I still have moments of neediness, particularly if…

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J Is For JUDGEMENTAL

We judge. We are human. We often judge a lot! Those more enlightened among us perhaps judge less, but judging is the way we compare and contrast. For example: I might say of someone: ‘I judge that behaviour to be unacceptable to me’. So I may choose to avoid that person and not behave like that myself – BUT, and it’s a big but, this does not mean that the…

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I Is For INSECURE

Insecurity is a fact of life. So few people, unless enlightened from birth, feel secure throughout their lives. I feel this world makes it almost impossible to feel secure all of the time, life in its essence is insecure because life is always changing, the world around us moves and shifts and our thoughts are never the same. The only thing that is not shifting is the awareness that is beyond all…

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E is for Embarrassment

As a perpetual blusher, embarrassment is something that has been a regular event in my life. I can’t remember a time when I did not blush, even during my early childhood I was very shy, hiding behind my mother and going red in the face at any sense of attention from others. At the moment I am more able to embrace the blushing feeling, but I question it because I…

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B is for BOREDOM

Many years ago I used to feel bored a lot; I was bored with life, bored with me, bored with what felt like a stagnant life I had opted in for, until I discovered mindfulness. Boredom is not possible when we rest in the awareness of the NOW. The present moment has no place for boredom. When I was bored in my past, I feel on some level it masked…

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A is for ATTRACTION

So they say beauty is the eye of the beholder and yet the subject of attraction can have many components. We are led to believe that we are automatically pre-disposed to find certain qualities attractive in another person, be it physical or biological, but over the years I have discovered that attraction can be fleeting, physical attraction most of all. Attraction and Infatuation Recently I had my first experience of…

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The Vulnerability Series Part 2 – Risking Rejection

 Continued on from Vulnerability Series Part 1 : Fear          Root chakra  Belonging – feeling unsafe to belong.  Better to not risk belonging because belonging equals the potential for being hurt and rejected. So to not allow myself to belong in any group, tribe or circle means no more rejection or hurt.  And in doing so, cutting off my connection to the abundance and support that the whole can…

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